The Top 10 Ways to Keep Passion in Your Relationship

All long-term relationships go through a variety of phases. There is the initial dating and courtship and infatuation period. If the relationship continues, it settles into a more stable time of building a history as a couple. If children enter the picture, that is a new phase. Later, there is another phase of being together as a mature couple with the wisdom of experience.
We all know that it is possible to keep passion, romance, excitement and sexual intensity alive through the years, but we also know that many relationships settle into a kind of friendly (or not so friendly) roommate situation. Every relationship has it’s ups and downs, but there are tools that can keep passion perking right along. Here are 10 of them:

1. Be kind.  I’m writing this on a cruise ship and it’s fascinating to watch people grouch at their spouses, then turn around and share a friendly smile with a stranger. We tend to take family and best friends for granted. A smile, a wink, just a moment of kindness goes a long way.
   
   
2. Be attentive.  Paying attention to the details of life is important. Pick up your own trash, and pick up for each other. Put things away, help each other with the small projects around the house. These things are the currency of love.
   
   
3. Be gracious.  Small surprises can create huge rewards in a relationship. I think of it as the "Martha Stewart Effect". Taking a moment to put on a clean shirt before dinner, or using the good china, or cutting a flower from the garden and putting it on the table, are examples. All these things add color, spice, and graciousness to our lives.
   
   
4. Be patient.  We all have bad days. It happens. When it happens to your spouse, be smart! Take the kids to the park for an hour, order Chinese take-out for dinner. Give him/her a break! This is the reality of life. Allow for it.
   
   
5. Be honest.  Tell the truth about your feelings, and do it promptly and in a respectful, effective way. Share your disappointments and fears, but also share dreams, hopes, and gratitudes. Keeping secrets kills passion.
   
   
6. Be funny!  Life seems to have supply its own stress and worry, but we have to provide the humor on our own. Share a joke, take time to tickle each other or rent a funny movie, and do it often. The couple that laughs together, often does other fun stuff together, too!
   
   
7. Be flexible.  Over a lifetime, people change. Hopefully, your relationship will change and grow and mature with as you change. One of you will change careers, the other will change religions. One will have an illness, the other will make a mistake. Relationships either bend and flex with the winds of life, or they break.
   
   
8. Be generous.  I’ve saved the best for last. After a survey of dozens of couples, the big 3 items that showed up over and over began with "give little gifts". Surprise each other with flowers, candy, a card, or other gift. Do it often. Do it for no particular reason. Do it because you love each other and thought it would be nice to show it with a gift.
   
   
9. Be available.  The second of the "big 3" was "take time for each other". Schedule time to walk and talk, go for drives in the country, go to dinner and see a movie together. Dozens of couples ranked time together as the most critical component in keeping romance and passion alive.
   
   
10. Be physical.  This is about sensuality perhaps more than sexuality. Couples talked about the importance of scents, of candles and flowers and walks on the beach. They talked about making love, but mostly they talked about back rubs and holding hands, and creating memories. They talked about getting dressed up and going out, and they talked about skinny-dipping. They talked about being playful and finding their own way. You can do this!

Someone has said, "Life is what happens while you were making other plans." Romance is about real life, not about dreams and fantasies of the perfect partner, someday on a Pacific island. Romance and passion are about taking time to enjoy the company of the person you love. Have fun. Do it today!

  "Written by Dr. Philip E. Humbert, writer, speaker and success coach. Dr. Humbert has over 300 free articles, tools and resources for your success, including a great newsletter! It's all on his website at:  http://www.philiphumbert.com "

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Overcoming Obstacles in Your Personal Relationships

Author: Leah Ryan

Personal relationships, whether romantic or platonic, are the bread and butter of life. How well you get to meet people and share experiences with them is an excellent gauge for your well-being. That said, relationships are not always a walk in the park. There will be times when you and the people you love will butt heads. Overcoming obstaclesjust comes with the package, and you will need to learn how to do so fairly and thoroughly. Here are a few things to keep in mind.

Communication is key

A lot of conflicts that occur between two people happen because of simple miscommunication. You may be saying one thing while your friend or partner may be interpreting it as something else. Because the other person misconstrued your meaning, their corresponding actions may not be to your liking, and a fight suddenly ignites. See how potentially dangerous a lack of clarity can be?

So, make sure every word shared between the two of you is crystal clear. Overcoming obstaclescan be done very easily just as long as you start saying what you mean. If you’re hesitant about what you have to say, don’t be. As long as you communicate with logic and honesty, you’re doing the right thing.

Be confident

Speaking of hesitation, a lack of confidence in relationships can be another big source of conflict. Your friend or partner needs to know that you think highly of yourself, of them, and of the relationship you two share. Showing confidence means that you place value in your shared experiences. If you exude shyness, hesitation, or apprehension, your friend or partner may see this is a sign that things are not working out well between you two.

When overcoming obstaclesrelated to this, then, start by showing a change in attitude. Be more positive around the people you love and respect. Be more enthusiastic when interacting with them. Take it upon yourself to suggest new experiences you can share, so you can prove that you highly value the time the two of you spend together. An experience can mean an expensive vacation abroad, or a simple dinner in the new restaurant down the block. Just show that you’re up for stuff and raring to go.

Keep your cool

In cases of particularly heated conflict, it’s best to break away and cool your head first before overcoming obstacles placed between you two. The worst thing you could possibly do in a relationship is to let your anger get the better of you. Anger is an incredibly selfish emotion, and if you want to resolve things as a team, then self-centered thoughts have to go out the door.

It’s not always true, for instance, that couples have to resolve all conflicts before going to bed. Rushing to a solution just so the both of you can already hit the sack doesn’t sound particularly wise. A lot of aspects of personal relationships require time, and this includes proper conflict resolution. Get some sleep. Start the day with a clear head. Make sure that the anger has dissipated significantly before broaching the topic of your fight again.

As long as you keep these three things in mind, the both of you will be fine. Best of luck!

Article Source: http://www.articleclick.com/Article/Overcoming-Obstacles-in-Your-Personal-Relationships/1948643

About the Author:

Leah Ryan has changed her life through the power of positive thinking. She also helps others, including her friends and family, in overcoming obstacles as well.

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